New Scams on POF

Christian Cafe: My recommendation to avoid dating scams, like those on POFPOF, or Plenty of Fish, is one of the oldest and most reputable dating sites on the Internet. It is free to find matches, connect with them, and there are marriages that took place among free members. So it’s a good service even if you never upgrade or pay them anything.

There are, however, some scams that are taking place on POF, and the scammers prefer POF because it costs them nothing.

There is the Russian/Nigerian scams, where the scammers pose as a female that starts the conversation with the male victim, and ask to take the conversation on Google Hangouts in particular for reasons that are not clear to me at the moment. Perhaps because they can use it without having to create a Google account!

Anyway, after talking about love, and trust, and even exchanging of some pictures (face ones of course) the conversation turns towards asking the male victim for money.

The scam has been around for sometime. I investigated it myself and went through different scenarios with the scammers trying to see their techniques and how they handle different situations.

This scam has been known for sometime now and it’s not news. The news is the local scams!

Again I am posting my experience as a male, because I don’t want to lie on my profile about anything. It counts as a lie, you know.

The female scammers wait until you contact them, and you will because they post very beautiful pictures. In one case the scammer initiated the contact and offer help in editing my profile in a way that would get more responses.

Then after you deal with the persona for some time the scammer would go on one of many routs that makes the victim sympathize with their grief (loss, feeling down …etc), and they explain that the problem is financial.

The victim, out of generosity offers to help with money, and the persona pretends to resist the temptation, or totally reject the offer in an exaggerated way. If you insist, or offer one more time later, this time they accept and ask for a small amount (around $100).

Then anything can happen. They delete their account so that you lose contact with them, and if you have transferred the money via email they don’t reply to your emails, even the phone number suddenly becomes not in service!

That’s why many of the users on POF only respond to upgraded members because the upgrading process involves verification of the identity of the members through their credit card or whatever payment method they used to upgrade.

And that’s why I only recommend services that don’t give much room to scammers by limiting the free features, like Christian Cafe. The free features are good and allow you to make choices and screening, but the freedom to contact and scam, or abuse (it happens, verbally) other members are not there.


How a Godly Man Treats his Woman

Daily Bible - Christian Singles DatingAs a Christian man you need to show the world how a Christian treats his woman. But before that we need to agree to a definition of a Christian man.

Our reference is the Gospel. There you’ll find examples of how Jesus treated women. Just copy him and you’re good.

One of the Marys was at his feet (she was always at his feet in the Gospel) perfuming his toes before his entry to Jerusalem. Three men were around and they started insulting her and calling her names.

Jesus didn’t participate in this sinful act of course, neither had he approved it by silence.

He stepped in and told those men to “leave her alone”.

What Jesus had done in this incident was setting the standard for how men should treat women.

In other words, he protected the woman from the assault carried on by men on her.

Your job as a man is to step in and protect the woman in your life from any assault she might be facing.

I wish I could say that you should step in and protect any woman who might be facing an assault. That would be perfect in an ideal community.

In our current time this is not always an option. Some times if you step in to protect a woman from an assault you might get yourself in bigger troubles than the assault she’s facing.

However, there are things you can do to protect stranger women from certain types of assault.

For example, if your guy-friends are sexualizing a woman you know, as a Christian man you should step in and ask them to stop. Defend your sister’s honour.

If your friends are mentioning a female co-worker (or classmate) and describing her in a degrading way, your duty as a Christian man is to step in and defend your sister. Even if she was a sinner, who isn’t?

And of course if a woman in your family is being assaulted you have to step in and do something. If you don’t do it, who do you expect to do it for you?

This world is turning into a jungle. If we think it as humans with our limited knowledge one would say that it is not a good idea to bring any kids to this world. Luckily this is not our job to predict the future.

I a confident that God has a plan for this world, and my role in has already been determined. Knowing about it is another story though. What I am trying to do now is to call other humans back to the right path. If one answers I will be very satisfied.



Dating as a Christian man

christian-cafe-datingDaily Bible - Christian Singles DatingDating as a Christian is so easy and simple if you memorize and apply the following few rules. As a Christian man it is your duty to make sure the two of you are abiding by the biblical guidelines.

Rule #1: Intimacy is off the table. 

As long as you are not married yet there is no place for intimacy. So to apply this rule your hands are to stay off your date until the day of the wedding. There are exceptions of course, like when she trips and falls on you, go down something higher than one foot, getting her hair stuck in “her” zipper … etc. In these cases you have to make it brief and focused on the task of saving or helping her. Once you’re done, hands off.

Rule #2: Stay in light, public places.

If you are to decide where you are going on a date pick a public place (no visiting your aunt on the way home please) that has enough light to see and be seen by others around you. The devil, our eternal enemy, prefers darkness, so don’t give him advantage.

If she is to choose it is still your duty to make sure the place is suitable for Christian dating.

Rule #3: Don’t go too far.

It’s better to stay close to her home. This will make her more comfortable and confident that she will get help soon enough if she needs it. It also means you will get to your destination soon enough to start the dating thing with less unnecessary silent moments. Those are the moments that the bad thoughts could start surfacing in your mind (hers too, I am not picking on you, it’s just this article is for you; the guy).

Also if close enough you can walk. Another way to avoid being alone in the privacy of your car.

Rule #4: If you are watching a movie, watch it in her living room.

This way you will have to choose something PG 14 or for kids if she has young siblings (try to enjoy it … good training on when you have your own kids). Also you will avoid the darkness of the movie theater and the moments of silence.

If she has a younger sibling put him/her in the middle between the two of you. You are still taller and can see each other face easily. If not, keep a distance so that your bodies don’t touch. You are not ready for this touch until you are married, so don’t get yourself hungry while the turkey is still in the farm.

Also it is a good opportunity to know her family better. When you marry a girl you are actually marrying the whole family in a sense. You will be dealing with her mom more than your own. Her siblings will be regulars at dinners and Sundays. And your kids will be spending most of their childhood at your in laws house than in yours.

Rule #5: Keep your conversations clean.

Like intimacy itself being off the table, talking about it is off the table as well. You can not discuss with your date any intimate issues. Keep it clean.

There is way more to life than intimacy. There is a lot more in life that you can enjoy without sinning. Remember our father Adam’s temptation and learn from the lesson. He had the whole paradise to enjoy but he and Eve left all of that whole paradise and fell in the temptation of eating from that forbidden tree.

So stay away from the tree and enjoy life. You will miss these days that you have no responsibilities. Really.



More on Banks the Christian Mingle Rapist

online dating? do a back ground check with instant check mate

Daily Bible - Christian Singles DatingBefore we get to the story there are two things that I need to make clear.

First of all Mr. Banks is accused of raping two victims he met on dating sites, one in 2012 from Christian Mingle, and another one in 2009 he met on This proves my point in the previous post that as a rapist he would have done it regardless of the name of the site he found his victim on.

Second, there are other crimes that took place through dating websites. For instance on abc news website there are two related stories: a woman suing for $10M because it matched her with a guy who stabbed her and almost killed her. Now this is more serious than rape if you value life more than dignity. Another story on the same website is about a man, 50, being charged of scamming 10 victims on a dating website. The man promised them marriage and got them to invest in a bogus company and ripped them off their savings. For some this as bad as rape if you consider that if you trust someone you might invest all of your life savings in his company and end up with no retirement you trusted the wrong person.

Have you ever heard the term “Catfish” in the online dating world? Watch the video below:

More ABC US news | ABC World News

Back to Mr. Banks. The sentence of 37 years to life for raping two victims seems satisfying to the victims.

In a previous post I mentioned that he is a graduate student. The news is that he’s an ex naval officer. Doesn’t matter really.

Now to the big point that I want you to take home ladies. The mistake of the most recent rape victim is that after a month of texting she invited him over to her apartment to watch a movie on thanksgiving eve.

As a Christian she is not supposed to do that. She is not supposed to invite a man to be alone with at her apartment and watch a movie together without any other company.

As a man I sympathize with her, especially after reading about the details of the rape and the horror she went through. “Surviving a rape leaves you feeling dead inside”, her words describing how she feels, are enough for me to keep her in my prayers. However, also as a man I find being invited to spend time with a woman in her apartment alone watching a movie (regardless of what kind of movie) is extremely tempting. The man brought his own bar with him as the victim says. This is someone who came prepared for the sin.

The first time you meet your date ladies please do it in a public place. Not only the first time to be frank. As long as you haven’t heard the phrase “You may now kiss the bride” you’re not supposed to meet in private. Remember our enemy whose job is to misguide us and take us with him to eternally burn in the Hell fire.

This website is here to promote chastity among Christians, and safety among daters in general. Date with that in mind. You have already sold yourself to the Lord. You are not free to do whatever you want with your body. And inviting a man you had never seen before to be with you alone at home is not safe. The Internet allows predators to change their skin as frequently as you change your cloth. Our subject in this post is someone who used an alias instead of his real name, and exchanged thoughts about Jesus and the bible with his victim. This is a good example of what anonymity could bring to you if you’re not careful enough.

The devilish nature of the sinner here got him all the courage he needed to use the holy scripture verses to get to sinfully fulfill his desires. He even twisted the meaning of the verse: “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good” during his trial, and forgot that despite that God intended it for good, the person who committed the harm is still an eveil sinner!

It’s a good idea to run a background check on the person you are interested in dating. It’s the least you should do if you are serious about your relationship with that person.

Click here to run a background check on anyone.


Maximize your use of singleness … singles!

Meet Christian Singles Free TrialDaily Bible - Christian Singles DatingI was watching a video about a dating the Christian way, and I was thrilled with the a concept I haven’t talked about before.

Singles … appreciate your singleness! Seriously single Christians, there is a lot in being single that you’ll miss when you get married.

Now singles you have the time to do anything you want. You can volunteer in your Church, and you can also build your body, soul, wealth, career, and everything that you think like “when I am married I’ll have a wife besides me to help and share my success with …” ….. no you won’t!

You wont, not because she’ll be selfish and will not appreciate your success. You just won’t have time to do anything of that. Do it first, establish the foundations, and once you are on the track you can start thinking about starting a relationship.



Christian Dating Sites Rape

Daily Bible - Christian Singles DatingToday in the news I heard the story of a PhD student accused of two accounts of rape, a burglary. and a threat to witness not to talk. Although it’s not news so far because it happens all the time, what caught my attention is the mention of the site Christian Mingle in the story. Christian mingle is the main sponsor of this blog, and over the years there were no complains of the site itself. That’s why I wanted to write about it.

Christian mingle is a dating site. Their job is to collect the information from the participants and then based on this info they suggest matches for every member according to what they have to offer and what they want in their match.

So far Christian mingle is like any other dating site. They collect the information and match the members.

The problem has nothing to do with Christian mingle, or any other dating site. All the dating sites work the same way, more or less. The threat is not from those sites in particular. The issue is the anonymous nature of the Internet.

Anyone can fake personal data and create a profile on a dating site. And if you remember the story of my friend who was a scam victim of a very famous and expensive website.

You can read her story here.

This incident of a man raping his date has nothing to do with the dating site, or the Internet. The person, if really guilty, is a rapist. If he can perform on a resisting victim it means he is aroused by her suffering. Normal people would be turned off with serious resistance.

I am assuming, and I could be wrong, that the rapist in the news above could have done it without the Internet, and without Christian mingle. If he starts dating a woman he knew from the church and got the opportunity to be with her alone he would have tried to rape her.

The point I want to prove to you is that a rapist is a rapist regardless of how he met his victim. It’s a personal behaviour and has nothing to do with technology.

If you agree with me on this point, you might as well wonder with me why did they name the dating site in the news. Is it an attempt to defame Christian mingle? It could be. Could it be an attempt to defame Christian dating sites (because they only mention the name of the site in the details, the headlines say “Christian dating site”) in favour of secular ones?

You can read more about this news on NBC News.


Setting the Boundaries in Christian Dating

Meet Christian Singles Free TrialDaily Bible - Christian Singles DatingDating is probably one of the most critical phases of a Christian because the actions you take while dating can affect and influence your life positively or negatively and cause you to increase or decline in your walk with God. There are numerous perilous aspects that many Christians overlook or ignore as a result of societal arguments, ignorance or a blind view of the truth. Before a Christian dates anyone, s/he must consider any and everything that surrounds their decision to date others.

As a Christian, when you date, you are not to date like the world does, but you are to date in line with the scriptures. Principally, you must be convinced that you are ready to get married and every opportunity for “trial and error” should be avoided. For example, some people would want to give any one of the opposite sex a shot to see what happens, but taking that route may cause you problems that will stick with you for the rest of your life.

Before you begin a dating relationship, you should clearly spell out your beliefs—rooted in the commands of God. If the other person does not agree with your beliefs, you should make a decision to cut your ties with that person because we are to cut off anything that will cause us to stumble, in other words, anything that will cause us to sin (Matthew 18:8; Matthew 5:29; Matthew 5:30; Mark 9:43). When applied in this case, it is evident that a person can drag us into an unpleasant situation or influence us to commit the sin of fornication, hence if a person or thing causes you to deviate from God, cut it off! This may sound a bit harsh but in critical situations such as dating or relationships, it is best to stick with God’s plan for us.

Likewise, we are commanded not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14). Therefore, we should not date or get involved in relationships with unbelievers thinking we can change them or make them believers.

Next, communicate your boundaries during the course of your relationship and be disciplined enough to make sure you both stick to them. The bible says we are to abstain from unlawful sexual activities. As Song of Solomon repeatedly says, do not do or commit to anything until it is time to do so, that time in this case is the covenant of marriage. Until then, we are warned to avoid “porneia”, a term for all kinds of sexual sin.

Paul, the apostle, inspired by the Holy Spirit, further warns us: “flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.  Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?” (1 Corinthians 6:17-19).

We must avoid any sexual contact until marriage for our body is where the Spirit of God resides (both in the Spirit and in our vessel, as in the body). Some people may think, “Well it’s my body so I can do whatever I want”…well, not exactly true. Although we still have our “free will” granted by God, as true Christians we have been bought with a price (remember the sacrifice of the Christ), therefore we are to honor God with our bodies (1 Corinthians 7:23; 1 Corinthians 6:8).

To remain in check, you should date openly, not in secret, and get your family involved. Remember, we are still flesh and blood and we all face temptations to do the wrong thing, so when you date someone you are attracted to, avoid being alone together. If you have to be together, you should be in a public place—for the devil roams about looking for whom to kill, to steal and to destroy (John 10:10). Therefore, “be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8). This means at any given opportunity, the enemy will strike.

If you struggle with sleepovers, such going beyond the scriptural bounds described in Song of Solomon 8 verse 4 as stated earlier, you will need to address the issue. Go on your knees and ask the Lord to help you because it is by his grace that we are able to accomplish anything good, without which, we are helpless. The grace of God is like grease or oil that removes any rustiness. That same grace is what we need to be strong enough to say no even when our flesh kicks in. Reflect on these words: “It is better to marry than to burn with passion” (1 Corinthians 7:9). Clearly, Paul knew that we are all human (just like him) and recommends that we get married rather than stay in that state of “burning passion” that may lead us to commit sin.

We have the responsibility of ensuring we do the right thing by obeying God’s instructions so that we may live and prospers in our undertakings (Deuteronomy 5:33).  Hence, to be sure of where you stand, your connection with each other should be beyond the physical. There should be a deeper understanding between the two of you and the foundation of your relationship should be rooted in Christ and the commands of God.

Paul exhorts us to bear out our sexual desires through a loving, sacrificial relationship with our spouse (1 Corinthians 7). That is, we must keep God at the center of our relationship and let our intimacy with him bear up our spiritual intimacy with each other, which will, in turn support all other intimacy, such as mental, emotional, physical, and sexual, without infamy and without sin. In all, always remember that as a true Christian, to prosper in your relationships and all that we put our mind to, we must obey God’s commands and instructions.

==> Find Your Christian Soulmate Here.


Christian Dating Online – What Are The Benefits

Meet Christian Singles Free TrialDaily Bible - Christian Singles DatingBy Bill Williams

There has been a rapid rise of Christian dating online services. This article aims to highlight some of the benefits that a Christian dating online services provide as they address the various hurdles one would have to overcome in seeking out that Godly mate.

There has been a rapid rise of Christian dating online as a result of changing work patterns and lifestyles making it difficult for Christians looking for a suitable spouse. In some cases Church congregations tend to be smaller and may not have many single Christians and even then, none may be that special person. It is therefore no great surprise to the rise of Christian dating online as an attempt to address the various hurdles one would have to overcome in seeking out that Godly mate.

There are several advantages to Christian dating online some of which are listed following.

1) Most Christian dating online sites require that subscribers provide a personal profile. This allows one the ability to search and review profiles of people that you believe that you are comfortable and compatible with. You then have an opportunity to evaluate peoples profile, including religious background and faith culture, making it more probable that you will find just the right kind of person with whom you can spend the rest of your life with. There is therefore no pressure to compromise your hearts desire, just be patient and make full of every available resource that a Christian dating online site offers and be an active participant. Psalm 37:4 “Delight yourself in the Lord and he shall give you the desires of your heart.”

2) Having come up with a short list, most Christian dating online sites offer some form of secure email or chat facility, so you do not have to give away personal contact details to total strangers until you get to know them. If the Christian dating online site does not offer secure email you are best to get a free yahoo, hotmail or similar account and use that until a level of trust has been achieved. Relationships should never be rushed and Christian dating online allows you to build relationships in a relaxed and secure environment.

3) Most Christian dating online sites have various forums that enable you to exercise your spiritual gifts through prayer, bible study and general discussions. These forums are a great way that Christian dating online sites facilitate the assessment of possible matches especially if the people you are interested in are active contributors. Some Christian dating online sites will also facilitate meetings in local areas allowing you to meet in a secure public place and more importantly in the company of other Christians.

4) For the more adventurous, Christian dating online sites provide the opportunity of building relationships with people who may not be in your immediate geographical vicinity.

5) Finally it appears to work, several Christian dating online sites report that several of their subscribers do indeed find the spouse of their dreams. However, reading the success stories would indicate that a lot of time, work, patience and prayer goes into building a successful relationship and a willingness to keep on using to the full, resources that a Christian dating online site offers.

In conclusion, Christian dating online allows for the connection to other like minded Christians. The developing of relationships, and eventually leading to the finding of that special person in a secure and spiritually healthy environment.

Bill Williams is a youth leader as well as the director of small groups within his local church, For more information on Christian dating online, free downloadable dating resources which include articles, reviews on the best Christian Dating Online sites, visit his blog All About Christian Dating Online

Note: If you find this Christian dating outline article useful, you may reprint it on your website, ezine, or in your newsletter as long as the credits above remain intact and the hyperlinks to All About Christian Dating Online stay active.

Copyright Bill Williams 2007 All About Christian Dating Online

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Important Online Christian Dating Tips For Dating a Godly Single Christian Woman

Meet Christian Singles Free TrialDaily Bible - Christian Singles DatingBy Juliet Klee

If you are looking for a way to start dating Christian women the answer may be as close as your computer. These days there are a wealth of online dating sites, including many sites dedicated to dating Christian women. Finding the best of these online Christian dating services will help you find the most attractive and most spiritually successful women in your town or area of the country.

Evaluating an Online Christian Dating Service

Of course not all internet dating sites for Christians are created equal, and it is important to evaluate each site carefully. After all, if your ultimate goal is to start dating Christian women you will need to make sure that there are plenty of single Christian women signed up for the site. It is always a good idea to browse the profiles of the site before signing up. Or, in some cases, take full advantage of a free basic (limited) membership to look around and see if the site features and other members are a good fit for you. In other cases you may be offered some sort of free trial membership, and it is a good idea to accept that trial period if it is offered. This trial period will allow you to determine if the site you have found will be a good venue for dating Christian women in your area of interest.

When evaluating an online Christian dating service for dating Christian women it is a good idea to look through the profiles of the women who are already members, paying careful attention to things like where the women go to church and how often, their level of commitment to Christ and their Christian maturity level. This information will help you to determine whether or not the site is a good one for dating Christian women, or just a secular dating site masquerading as a Christian dating site. Some sites appear on the surface to be a Christian dating site, when in fact the site is just a secular dating site masquerading as a Christian dating service for one reason only, money! Your money!

Joining an Online Christian Dating Service

Once you have found a site that you trust and think will be good for dating Christian women it is time to sign up and start building your own personal dating profile. When creating your profile it is important to be up front and honest about what you want from a Christian dating partner and what you have to offer. Try not to be too self-deprecating or too self-aggrandising as you build your profile. The Christian women on the site will appreciate honesty–if you plan to start dating Christian women you will need to be honest about both your good qualities and your shortcomings.

Dating a Single Christian Woman Face to Face

After you have submitted your online dating profile and found several matches it is time to actually start contacting them with the goal of dating Christian women face to face. But do not rush things. Take your time getting to know the single Christian women a little better before you meet them in person. These days dating Christian women can take several different approaches. Some men will want to meet their matches in person right away, while others may prefer to get to know their potential dating partners in the virtual world first. No matter which approach you take to dating Christian women it is important to be honest in your conversations, emails and your online dating profile. Post current, unaltered photos. After you have gotten to know one another you will need to determine when to take that all important step of meeting face to face.

Dating a Godly Single Christian Woman

Some men may be intimidated when they start dating a Christian woman, especially if she has been a Christian longer than them, but it is important to be calm, cool and collected on that all important first date. Nervous Christian men may be able to put their minds at ease with the knowledge that they have already gotten to know their Christian lady friend online. Pray for the right approach. After all God knows the two of you better than you know each other.

Remember that Christ is working in all Christians to conform us to the image of Jesus Christ. It is Christ-like character that will ultimately win her heart. Pray for the peace that surpasses all understanding, ask God for the power to just be yourself, and trust in Him for good results. While dating some Christian women can be intimidating at first, in the end it can be extremely rewarding as well. You get the privilege of spending time with a sister in Christ, a precious daughter of the Creator of the universe.

Think of it as dating Christian royalty and treat her like a princess.

Juliet Klee would like to invite you to let our detailed reviews of Christian dating sites help you find the top Online Christian Dating Service that is just right for you. Plus, you will find over 50 articles on Christian dating and singles relationships. Visit today for more advice on Christian dating for Christian singles who want to honour and please Jesus Christ in their dating relationships!


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Where to go for a first date

Daily Bible - Christian Singles DatingAs mentioned else where on this site the best place to find a date who appreciates the same values as you do is through your Church. If there is a dating service in the Church then it’s a good place to start. There are also reputable online dating services for Christians like Christian Cafe and eHarmony.

After you find someone you are interested in through your favourite dating service, or through friends and family recommendations, it’s time to start seeing each other to know more about one another, which is also known as “dating”. Before you think of what to wear or what to say to them you should be thinking about where to go on your first date.

Where to go for the first date is totally up to you of course, but there are places better than others because as a devoted Christian you are different from the rest of the community. And instead of listing places that fit for a first date it’s better to list the criteria of such a place.

The first criterion of such a place is to be a public place. Devoted Christians don’t date in private places where temptations are at the maximum. In public everybody can see that you two are dating so that no one will try to approach any of you for a date. Also you can learn more about each other preferences when you discuss choosing a place for your first date.

The second criterion is that it should not be a place where the only drinks available are alcoholic such as in bars. You need to be sober all the time you are with your date, and especially on your first date. The first impressions last longer and are not easy to change.

A third criterion is that it should have proper illumination because you two need to see each other clearly. Day light is the best of course if available, but if you have to meet at night the kind of illumination plays a role on how you two perceive the other. Night clubs are not an option in this context for the illumination part and for being too loud.

And this brings us to the fourth criterion, which is that it should be where you two can hear each other clearly. It’s a big turn off if you keep asking your date to repeat him- or herself.

A fifth one is that it’s preferable not to go where everybody knows the two of you. One reason is that you’ll not have the time for each other with everybody around you greeting you and asking embarrassing questions like “are you two dating” or “what happened to Jane or John” (your ex)? Another reason is that you don’t want to be approached by someone who might want to ruin it for you because of issues between you and them.

And remember that the Lord is watching over you. Don’t let Him see you doing something He dislikes for you to do. Please Him and you’ll be amazed. Be honest, be yourself, and be chaste if you expect the same from your date.