Where to go for a first date

Christian Singles Dating - Christian CafeAs mentioned else where on this site the best place to find a date who appreciates the same values as you do is through your Church. If there is a dating service in the Church then it’s a good place to start. There are also reputable online dating services for Christians like Christian Cafe and eHarmony.

After you find someone you are interested in through your favourite dating service, or through friends and family recommendations, it’s time to start seeing each other to know more about one another, which is also known as “dating”. Before you think of what to wear or what to say to them you should be thinking about where to go on your first date.

Where to go for the first date is totally up to you of course, but there are places better than others because as a devoted Christian you are different from the rest of the community. And instead of listing places that fit for a first date it’s better to list the criteria of such a place.

The first criterion of such a place is to be a public place. Devoted Christians don’t date in private places where temptations are at the maximum. In public everybody can see that you two are dating so that no one will try to approach any of you for a date. Also you can learn more about each other preferences when you discuss choosing a place for your first date.

The second criterion is that it should not be a place where the only drinks available are alcoholic such as in bars. You need to be sober all the time you are with your date, and especially on your first date. The first impressions last longer and are not easy to change.

A third criterion is that it should have proper illumination because you two need to see each other clearly. Day light is the best of course if available, but if you have to meet at night the kind of illumination plays a role on how you two perceive the other. Night clubs are not an option in this context for the illumination part and for being too loud.

And this brings us to the fourth criterion, which is that it should be where you two can hear each other clearly. It’s a big turn off if you keep asking your date to repeat him- or herself.

A fifth one is that it’s preferable not to go where everybody knows the two of you. One reason is that you’ll not have the time for each other with everybody around you greeting you and asking embarrassing questions like “are you two dating” or “what happened to Jane or John” (your ex)? Another reason is that you don’t want to be approached by someone who might want to ruin it for you because of issues between you and them.

And remember that the Lord is watching over you. Don’t let Him see you doing something He dislikes for you to do. Please Him and you’ll be amazed. Be honest, be yourself, and be chaste if you expect the same from your date.


Make Her Laugh

Christian Singles Dating - Christian CafeThis post is specifically for men who found the woman they want to spend the rest of their lives with and don’t know how to approach her. It’s also a good start for those who have issues with their marriages. It also works with stubborn kids and teens.

The absolute best in approaching a woman for marriage is to make her laugh. It is also proven scientifically that when we laugh our brains release some chemicals, and subconciously we relate the good feeling we have when we laugh with the surroundings. That’s why there are places that you have special feelings for because you have had good times there laughing and enjoying yourself.

The same with people. If you feel happy in a certain place you relate to everything around you including people, and specially the person who made you feel happy.

Now let’s focus a little bit about making her laugh. If you can get her to genuinely laugh with you from the heart she’ll subconsciously relate you with the good feelings she develops while laughing. The more you do it the more this correlation builds, to a point when she feels good around you even if you don’t make her laugh. So when you approach her for marriage she’ll seriously consider your proposal because she wants to be around you all the time.

Note that I said “laugh with you” and not “laugh at you”. If you can make her laugh at you she’ll feel good and happy, and she’ll develop some feelings for you, but not the kind of feelings that can lead to marriage. Women love to be around a funny person all the time, but clowns are good for a certain time for a certain occasion not all the time.

The combination that works towards making her want to spend the rest of her life with you is seriousness most of the time with breaks of a joker who makes serious times feel good instead of stressful. It’s a combination that only a small percentage of men know and practice.

For the most part this combination of humor and seriousness comes naturally to that small lucky percentage of men. However, if you don’t have this combination by nature you still can learn it.

I once attended a series of video classes that teach how to combine seriousness with humor, and the presenter coined a term for it: “High status humor”. The course is meant for any man who wants to win the heart of a woman. So please don’t be turned off by his approach to other guys who just want to date casually, it also works for serious ones who live with the believe that the Lord is watching over them and want Him to see them only where it’s lawful to be.

===> Click here to attend the “high status humor” classes online.